Portal to NightVale!
An AU where Cecil is in charge of Aperture Science,instead of GLaDOS.Also Carlos is the new scientist who is amazed and terrified of his new job.
CECIL:Hello, and, again, welcome to the Aperture Science Computer-Aided Enrichment Center.I will be guiding you through the various testing chambers you will be tortured in….I mean tested.
CECIL:Please note that we have added a consequence for failure. Any contact with the chamber floor will result in an “unsatisfactory” mark on your official testing record, followed by death. Good luck!
CECIL:Spectacular. You appear to understand how a portal affects forward momentum, or to be more precise, how it does not. Momentum, a function of mass and velocity, is conserved between portals. In layman’s terms: speedy thing goes in, speedy thing comes out.
CECIL:This next test applies the principles of momentum to movement through portals. If the laws of physics no longer apply in the future … God help you.
I don’t care about America’s Birthday,I just wanna watch pretty colors explode.:D
I don’t owe you shit!
Let me make this clear.I don’t care how nice you are.I don’t care if your a “Nice guy.” or how many people think I should give you a chance.If I don’t feel attracted to you,I ain’t gonna go out with you.
I’m not gonna sleep with you,I’m not gonna tell you how sweet you are.I don’t care how long you try to convince me,or how much money or gifts you cash out.
I DON’T OWE YOU SHIT!!!
And if you think I do,then you aren’t really a nice guy.You are a self entitled asshole with an inflated ego!! And I hope anyone who agrees with Elliot Rodger gets anally raped with a long,rusty metal pike!!!